“La vie ce n’est pas d’attendre que les orages passent, c’est d’apprendre comment danser sous la pluie.” Sénèque

“Life isn’t about waiting for the storms to pass, it’s about learning how to dance in the rain.” Seneca

So I’m learning how to dance in the rain with my recuperating knee. I’ve come through my first really mega-intense wave of emotionality through and elicited by Alexander Technique teacher training, phew, and well, I feel like I have been hiding and now I’m slowly coming out of my hiding place. I really need to practice that dancing in the rain stuff because I think these storms will keep happening. I better get used to being off kilter. I was just remembering when a colleague at work asked me the other day how I was doing, and I said “Oh I’m totally out of it!” With that I gave him a huge smile. And he told me that’s why he liked me so very much…I was always totally out of it in the same way he is totally out of it. We stood there grinning goofily at each other. So perhaps the thing to do when a wave of emotionality hits is to be totally out if it…ditsy so to speak…while dancing in the rain. Smiling in the rain! 😀

I am feeling a certain kind of quiet descend upon me, enveloping me. My trainer said the other day that when he is using himself better the kinesthetic chatter goes away, and that he feels a certain quiet within. Love that! Maybe that’s what’s happening with me.

But alas, I guess I have been run down lately. A persistent cough/cold thing turned suddenly into a nasty case of asthmatic bronchitis. Yuck. Why am I not surprised? It’s my go-to illness. What would FM Alexander say about this turn of events? That my use of self isn’t so hot? Sigh…I guess I’m stuck with another training hiatus…albeit a way shorter one this time around.

Meanwhile…on the training front…before the asthmatic bronchitis hit…it was monkey. What else? Now we are putting hands on each other. So first monkey with hands on back of chair, then monkey with hands on table, then monkey with one hand on a shoulder, the other hand on a hip bone. Find that hip bone! Of course I have put hands on before, in my first semester of training, and in lessons, but we are just starting to do this now in my present training course. So it’s been awhile. But now I am so much more aware of my use of self when doing so.

The famous in NYC dollar a slice pizza joint on the way to TCAT-NYC. Not bad in a pinch!

So, are you wondering, what the relevance of a photo of a pizza joint is to this blog post? Well I have no real answer. Except maybe that I was remembering that after the very first lesson I had with my teacher, who is now my trainer, I had a slice there. I had never gotten around to trying the place until that moment. A bit of historical perspective for you, dear reader. And, me personally, I do think that pizza is always relevant! Even now in this moment when all I want to eat is chicken soup!

Position of mechanical advantage aka monkey. Bring it on! Over and over and over again in many of its permutations. Monkey with hands on table palms up, palms down, monkey with back against a wall, monkey facing a wall, monkey with hands on back of chair, squats, monkey, monkey, monkey… Some instructions for yours truly include… “Knees forward and up.” “Lengthen from your thoracic spine.” “Lengthen as you go down.” “Need that elasticity when folding/unfolding those legs.” “Lead with your knees not with your hips.” “Lengthen and widen that back.” “After all, we want to keep that integrity of the lengthening and widening as we go about doing our daily activities.”

Monkey going into monkey…

“Don’t grip don’t grip don’t grip don’t grip.” Gripping is my specialty. A huge light bulb went off for me a few days ago. When I went into monkey, when I went up and down from a chair, when I started to do all sorts of movements…well…I sort of held my breath. I was gripping in this particular way. So what if it took me over three years of lessons and one plus semesters of teacher training to finally figure out that I’ve been doing this? Whatever. At least I figured it out. So then of course I did the opposite…and intentionally started over breathing or something. “Don’t force your breathing!”

Going into monkey with fluidity and elasticity, while keeping all my directions going, is challenging. It’s getting better but when will it be really organic with me??? “Oh! There is more movement happening throughout your ribs!” “Your breathing is different.” “Yes!!! That’s good Rena!!!” “Did you feel the difference?” And so we practice monkey over and over and over again in Alexander Technique teacher training. Je suis crevée, moi! I am wiped out! This stuff takes lots of mental and physical energy, yes it does! But I happen to be feeling really fine these days. I am more “up” than I used to be. Big smile here!